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JUNE 18, 1982 / MONTROSE VOICE 29
-808 Pacilic-52t-2519
• KEYBOARD-3012 Milam-528-6988 witr
piano entertainment
See our ad elsewhere this issue
Pulitizer prize winner
Ben Sargent,
exclusive in Houston
in the Montrose Voice
• K'NDRED SPIRITS-5245 Buffalo
Sp vay -665-9756 predominantly lesbian
S-. ur ad elsewhere this issue
"■es Blvd-528-8921: les-
• LAZY J-3-.
• LOADING DOCK
1818: leather d.scr:
•AMARY'S—1022 Wes1heimer-526-88_> 1
See our ad elsewhere this issue
There's more Montrose
sports coverage in the Voice
• MISS CHARLOTTES- 911
-529-
• NUMBERS 2- 300 Westheimer-526-6551
See our ad elsewhere this issue
• PINK ELEPHANT .218 LMland 659-0040
with shows
See our ad elsewhere this issue
• RANCH 662J
• RASCALS -2702 Kirby-52a-6272 with res
tauranl. live enterteinmenl
See our ad elsewhere this issue
Come out and celebrate
Gay Pride Week
• ROCKY'S—3416 W Dallas- 528-8922 I
• TWIN3-53S Westheimer-520-0244 I
• VENTURE-N-2923 Main-522-0000
ORGANIZATIONS
ACLU-1236 W. Gray-524-5925
AMERICAN LEATHERMEN {social club)-
meets at Different Drum. 1732 Westheimer
528-8528 Club night Wed
Got a question? Call the
Gay Switchboard, 529-3211
ASTRO" Rainbow Alliance-524-4793 (voice &
TTY)
BERING'Memorial Methodist Church 1440
Hawthorne-526-1017 United Methodist worship service 10:50am Sun
CHURCH OF CHRISTIAN FAITH-413 Westhei-
mer-529-6005. worship services Sun morning
& evening & Wed evening: Bible study Mon &
Tubs evenings: choir practice Wed evening
Tremendous circulation
in Montrose—the Voice
CITIZENS FOP HUMAN EQUALITY (CHE]"-
609 Fannin M301 -236-8666 board meeting 2nd
Tuesdays. "Be a Sport" party benefit (or MSA
June 17, Miss Charlotte's, 911 W Drew
COLT 45'S (social ciub|—meets at Brazos Rive'
Bottom, 2400 Brazos-528-9192
GAY SWlTCHBOARD-529-3211
GREATER MONTROSE Business"Guild: spon-
sormg members include E/Js club. Frame of
Reference. Montrose Voice. Speedy Printing.
Spud-U-Like. Travel Tech travel agency
See our ad elsewhere this issue
HEPATITUS" HOTLINE—Jim or David at 777-
2287 a project of GPCs Medical Committee
HOME COALlfioN-1409 Oakda.e-521-0196
COMMUNITY COFFEEHOUSE-project ol
CONG AYTZ CHAYIM- meets
Decatur-552-1340, 688-8997 I
Bpm 2nd & 4lh Fridays
CONROE AREA Gay V
CRISIS HOTLINE-228-1505
ONLY the Voice saturates
Montrose each week, now
with over a hundred
distribution locations
DATA PROFESSIONALS-meets at La Qumia
Motor Inn. 4015 Southwest Fwy —522-7809.
523-6922 meeting 2nd Tuesdays
DIAL-a-Gay An
Athetsl League of America
DIANA FOUNDATION-2700 Mason 524-
5791 The Best ol the Diana Awards Bpm June
22. Numbers 2 300 Westheimer to benefit GPC
& Montrose Clinic
DIGNITY-mei'ts at Catholic Student Center,
1703 Bolsover-520-9269. 528-7644 meetings
■pm Saturdays
MSA & BWMT present
Juneteenth celebration
Saturday, noon-4pm,
Cherryhurst Park
FAMILY & FRIENDS of Gays-464-6663
HRST UNITARIAN Churcn"-5210Fannin-
1571: worship service 11 1 Sam Sun.
GREENSPOINT'F~M~1~960 Area Far-.
Friends-821-9681
Pulitizer prize winner
Ben Sargent,
exclusive in Houston
in the Montrose Voice
GAY ARCHIVES o' Texas project of Ir
GAY ATHEIST L_MQ
national convention Oct
Hotel. 3301 Southwest Fw>
-524-2222:
15-17. Americana
Houston
GAV ITALIAN Group—526-9844
GAY NURSES ft PHYSICIANS of Houston-c/o
GPC. 4600 Mam "217-777-2287
GAY POl iriCAL CAUCUS [GPC}- 460C Mam
H217-5S1-1000. general business meeting
7 30pm Isl Wednesdays, educational forum
7:30pm 3rd Wednesdays: The Best of the Diana
Awards' Spm. June 22. Numbers 2, 300 Westheimer. to benefit GPC & Monlrose Clinic
There's more Montrose
sports coverage in the Voice
GAY PRIDE WEEK 82 Comm.tlee-meets at
Kindred Spirits. 5245 Buffalo Speedway-784-
8699 meeting 2:30pm June 13: see "7-day
Calendar" elsewhere this issue 'or day-by-day
listing of events
Come out and celebrate
Gay Pride Week
Houston Area GAY 4 LESBIAN ENGINEERS &
Scientists-526-7386 meets 7pm 41h Wednes-
HOUSTON COMMUNITY CLOWNS-862-B314
HOUSTON HUMAN RIGHTS LEAGUE-523-
See our ad elsewhere this issue
INTEGRITY/'HOUSTON (formerly Episcopal
Integrity)—meets at Aufry House. 6265 Mam—
526-0555 meeting 7 30pm 2no Tuesdav.
• INTERACT/Houston (I/H Inc., formerly
lntegnty'HouS1on)-3405 Mulberry-529-7014.
694-1732 Community Colteehouse 7 30pm-
midnight Fn board meeting 7 30pm 1st Thursdays (varied localionsl, educational forum
7 30pm 3rd Thursdays
Got a question? Call the
Gay Switchboard, 529-3211
• KPFT Raoio FM-90- 4)9 Lovetl Blvd - 526-
40O0 Wilde n Stem gay radio show 10pm-
midniqh: I ■
LAMBDA ALANON-meets "JT 1st Unitarian
Church 5210 Fannin—521-9772: meeting Fri
evenmg
LUTHERANS CONCERNED-meetS at Grace
Lutheran Church. 2515 Waugh-521-0863, 453-
1143 meeting 2nd & 4th Tues evenings.
Assembly '82. 3rd biennial convention of Lutherans Concerned for Gay People. July 29-Auq 1
METROPOLITAN Community Church of Ihe
Resurrection (MCCR) —1919 Decatur—861-
9149 pot-luck dinner 7 30pm Sat ; worship services 10 45am & 7 15pm Sun & 7:15pm Wed .
membership inquirers class 7 30pm Mon..
Alanon meeting 8pm Mon . Alcoholics Anonymous meeting Bpm Mon & Thurs.; MCCR Choir
Gay Pride Week Fred Paei Memorial Concert.
Cullen Auditorium. U of H, June 26
Tremendous circulation
in Montrose—the Voice
MONTROSE CIVIC Club (Neartown)-meetsat
Bering Church. 1440 Hawthorne-522-1000
meeting 7 30pm fourth Tuesdays
MONTROSE CL1NIC--104 Westheimer-528-
5531 open 6-10pm Fn, 1-5pm Sun, 6-10pm
Tues « Thurs : The Besl of Ihe Di»na Awards"
Bpm. June 22. Numbers 2, 300 Westheimer. to
benefit Clinic and GPC
MONTROSE PATROL-520 Westheimer-528-
2273
MONTROSE SINGE"FtS-me«ts at MCCR, 1919
Decatur-528-0550 Gay Pride Week Fred Paez
Memorial Concert. Cullen Auditorium. U of H.
June 26
MONTROS"-. SPORTS ASSOCIATION (MSA)-
622-3304 "Be a Sport" party June 17 at Miss
Charlottes. 911 W Drew, sponsored by CHE
Montrose Sports BOWLING—plays al Stadium
Max
I 1982 MONTROSE VOICE. HOUSTON
I'm hoping someone will save his
quarter and play with me instead.
Tongue in Cheek
Only 7? I thought
there were more
By Peter Harrison
c 1982 Stonewall Features Syndicate
If you remember the Bible, and have always wondered what those
foolish virgins did with the oil for their lamps, here's a scoop: it's
been rediscovered in Jerry Falwell's smile.
Rev. Jerry has been hot on the trail of sinners lately, you and I
among them.
Of course, that's nothing new. I've had so much sulphur and
brimstone rained down on my head over the years that I could
strike fire if rubbed against a scratchy surface.
Ordinarily, I'd just let ol' Jer carry on and forget him. But he jes'
keeps a'comin' across the teevee, callin' down the wrath of God on
the likes of you and me, and a'gettin' the likes of Hon. JesseHelms
to write up a passel of legislatin' about how us folks who oughtn't
to speak our names should live.
Shoot! I thought Rev. Jer and Hon. Jess and I had an agreement. I planned on stayin' out of the pulpit, as long as Jerry
stayed out of the Statehouse. Now all bets are off. I don't have no
big-time teevee show behind me, but you folks are goin' to have to
show your faith by imaginin' the crepe de chine choir robe that
graces my manly shoulders, the hint of blue in my silver hair, the
swaying figures of the Heavenly Body Choir behind me (hallelujah!) hummin' the anthem as I preach. (My Man! Strangers in
the Night1!
"Brothers and sisters, lovers and possibilities. I've come before
you this evening, or very nearly. Be that as it may, let me bring to
your attention the Seven Deadly Sins.
Already, I see by your smiles that you are relieved. You thought
there were more, didn't you? Well, you must remember that there
are sins and there are specializations.
"Let us not cast the first stones. But once the stones are tossed,
let's get our rocks off at the oppostion.
Who are the opposition? Be not deceived. Even though the
speech and delivery of Rev. Ernest may sound like that of Truman
Capote, he is not of this flock. It may be the very fact that he has
not been flocked in years that makes him uncharitable.
"Let us rather look at God's eternal scoreboard, the Seven
Deadly Sins. Let's take them one by one and see who's behind.
Your dirty minds lead us from that unfortunate pun to the first
sin:
Lust. Ah, brothers and sisters, hunks and numbers, here we
take a one-nothing lead. There is no doubt that we are lustful and
horny, like unto that great sinner, Jimmy Carter. But how about
Anger. No, my sinning siblings, that is not our fault. Anger
maketh an ugly face, and who needs it? Rev. Jer is more likely to
express that emotion when talking about us or the women who
want to control their own lives.
Envy? Ah, we all envy the better-looking, the smartly-clothed.
But what of our opponents? Is there no envy, one for the other, of
higher ratings on the teevee? Verily, this sin is a draw. At the end
of the celestial third, the score is one-and-one half sins each.
Pride is the next sin, and those of us who celebrate Gay Pride are
guilty of it. But what of the pride of numbers of watchers, of size of
the place of worship? Again, Sin Number Four brings a draw.
Sloth is a trespass none of us can afford in the era of Reaganom-
ics. This is a strikeout for both sides.
Covetousness confuses some of you, due to the text of the biblical passage, "thou shall not covet thy neighbor's ass." This is a
snare and a delusion, a sin falling under "lust." Covetousness has
more to do with an evangelist who builds a glass temple, then cries
out for money to buy Windex.
Since every evangelist begs for money on each broadcast over a
station that costs millions, score one for the oppostion. At the
bottom ofthe sixth, the score stands evangelists 3, gays 2.
Gluttony is the last sin, and I'm afraid the evangelists take us
on that one, too. Rev. Jerry looks as if he's pretty big on the
biscuits-and-gravy circuit, and the PTL Club has a pair of singers
that have to pay excess weight charges on the airlines before they
show their luggage.
Compare this with the lineup on Polk Street or Third Avenue.
Undoubtedly, the winners are the gays, with a two-sin lead over
their opponents.
"Be sure to join us next week when the Range Grazers Association of Montana sings "For We Like Sheep," from Handel's work,
and my sermon is from the text, "Beware of false prophets."
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