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July 1996
THE WAND
Vol. 13, No. 7
Womynspace Activities / Networking Directory
Inside:
Pokey's Summer Reading List
Updated Resource Guide
Alternative Visions
Excerpts from satisfied clients of
Alternative Visions:
/ think what has impressed me the most is
the unique way they've managed to combine being
professional with such a sincere, personal approach
... I highly recommend the service to anyone
interested in a safe, novel approach to meeting new
people.
All of the women I've met through
Alternative Visions have been really interesting,
and we have shared common interests. Your
ability to "match" personalities and interests is
what makes your service so important and
successful.
We did my [video] taping last Thursday
evening, and I want to thank you for making it a
comfortable and pleasant experience. I was real
nervous at first but felt that it went really well.
You and Trudi are doing a great thing for our
community. My thanks to you both.
... / will take this opportunity for
allowing me to meet . Without your
service, the odds are that neither one of us
would even have met each other....
is absolutely the most beautiful
woman that I have ever met I knew what I
was waiting for, and it was without question
worth the wait
Trudi Phoenix-Stinson and Wendi
Stinson-Phoenix met at a lesbian resource center
in Dallas. They felt a strong connection at their
first meeting, and they talked about their dreams
together. Trudi felt the lesbian and gay
community deserved a quality system for helping
to establish and maintain relationships. Thus, the
idea for Alternative Visions (AV) was born.
Wendy had been working a year and a
half at a Dallas abortion clinic, having just
graduated from college with a degree in
counseling. Trudi had had a career in sales, with
awards from Dale Carnegie and Zig Ziglar. Trudi
asked Wendi to be her marketing director for the
company she wanted to start up, and she agreed.
The couple has been together about five years,
and AV will be four years old in September.
Their competitors in Dallas and Houston have
since closed their doors. Here in Houston, AV
took on the clients of the former service at no
extra charge. They felt that this action was well
worth their time, for it would help preserve the
reputation of dating services for the gay and
lesbian community.
What makes AV different from other
dating services is the spectrum of services
offered. They want to be known as the love
service for the gay and lesbian community. Not
only is AV a commercial service, but it also
qualifies as a personal service, with its owners
seeking to empower their clients. At this point,
they see themselves as humanitarian
philanthropists—though without the money they'd
like to back this up. They want to be able to
make an impact.
When a client comes in, they sit down
and talk to her. She is asked to complete an
eleven-page personality profile that shows the
value system, the goals, and the interests of the
individual. This method differs from computer
matching. Trudi and Wendi prefer to match their
clients by getting to know them very well. The
owners of AV want to be sure their clients are
ready for a relationship before introductions
begin. They make sure clients are ready
emotionally and otherwise (a background check
is also run on each applicant). Sometimes,
clients are referred to counseling. In her practice,
Wendi teaches "Power Tools" which she
describes as tools for living. Some of the tools
for relationships include creativity, commitment,
and trust. She plans to write a book about what
makes relationships work.
The next step of the service requires that
a video be made of the client. When Wendi and
Trudi determine a potential match, the two
selected women view each others' videos, and if
mutually acceptable, then phone numbers are
exchanged. First names only are exchanged at
this point. This process works especially well for
clients who are patient. The service is regarded
as a one-year process. Every two to three
weeks, a client views three to five videos. After
each viewing, a client lists what she liked and
what she didn't like about each one. If the likes
outweigh the dislikes, this is helpful in
determining a potential match. If clients are
happy with the woman they date, they can let AV
know that they want to date exclusively. Their
membership is then placed on hold status, and
no time is lost from their contract with AV.
Ninety percent of AV's clients are
degreed professionals. Some are new to the
area, and others are somewhat shy. Many of
them have everything they want in life, having
devoted a lot of time to their careers, except for a
relationship. Now, having achieved their goals,
they wish to share their lives. Clients mostly meet
according to their own arrangements, but other
meetings occur as well. Two women, selected
by Wendi and Trudi as a potential match, viewed
each other's videos and said "no" on the basis of
what they saw. Then, they met each other at a
picnic and hit it off right away. They have been
together ever since.
There are three to four social activities
per month. One workshop a month deals with an
aspect of relationships. About 30-35 regular
members go to the workshops on relationship-
building offered by AV each month. The next
workshop, to be held in the Montrose Library on
June 20, will be "What's Their Secret?" and
features couples who've stayed together for ten
or more years. The cost is $3.00 for non-
members. July's workshop will be "Blessing Your
Ex and Moving On," a program by Odelia
Mendez. Last month, the first issue of the
organization's newsletter came out. This issue
lists the mission of the organization:
The purpose of Alternative Visions is
to provide quality services to
gay/lesbian/bisexual and transgender
professional singles in our community with
the opportunity to participate in the selective
introductory services, social programs and
workshops available to them as members.. .;
to encourage the creation and maintenance of
solid, healthy relationships; to unify and
strengthen ourselves... with our passion,
knowledge, communication and pro-activism;
to educate ourselves and each other about
the nature of and potential for strong, healthy
relationships and to offer a safe place for
these to occur.
continued on page 5
Houston Women's Festival to
Offer Full-Scale Entertainment
Musicians, comediennes, artists,
vendors and artisans will share their talents
at the second annual Houston Women's
Festival Saturday, September 21st, at
Garden in the Heights, 3926 Feagan, one
block north of Memorial Drive.
Continuous live entertainment will
highlight the rich musical tradition of the Gulf
Coast region. Jazz, blues, rock, and folk are
just some of the musical styles that will be
heard throughout the day. Austin
singer/guitarist Nancy Scott will perform her
humorous, toe-tapping tunes. Also from
Austin, Diana Jones will share her heartfelt
and insightful songs.
Local favorite Girls with Guitars will
harmonize on original music from their
recent CD. Comedienne Nancy Ford will
entertain the audience with her diverse and
flourishing repertoire. Liviya, fresh from her
performance at the Houston Music Awards,
will share her gutsy, powerful tunes. Also,
singer/guitarist Rawslyn Ruffin will please
local fans with her solo appearance. These
are just some of the talented performers
who will share the stage at the Houston
Women's Festival.
Indoors in the Main Hall, festival
goers will be treated to a multi-media art
exhibit curated by local artist Laura Kellner.
The art show is yet another way to
experience and celebrate the rich cultural
assets of the country's fourth largest city.
Some of the displayed pieces will be
available for purchase by patrons of the arts.
Throughout the festival, a marketplace
of vendors will display handmade crafts, including
hand-carved wooden objects, candles and
clothing, native American Indian jewelry and
dream catchers, and items imported from other
continents.
Businesses and organizations will
highlight their services to the community.
Information about non-profit organizations will be
available at a free community booth. Games,
activities and prizes will also be offered
throughout the day.
Festival hours are from 1 p.m. to
midnight on Saturday, September 21st. Tickets
are $10 in advance, $12 at the door and are
available at Inklings Bookshop and Crossroads
Market. The Garden in the Heights is an
indoor/outdoor facility located between the
Heights and Montrose. The event will be held
rain or shine.
The Houston Women's Festival
produced by The Athena Art Project, a non-profit
organization. For more information, contact:
HWF P.O. Box 66604, Houston, Texas 77266-
6604; (713) 868-1910; e-mail address
AthenaArt@aol.com. |