| Transcript |
MARGIE ADAM NAKED KEYS
„UU^U^
Margie is back, and this time she's
at the piano alone, playing her own
music on this solo instrumental album.
You can hear her classical training,
feel her jazz influences, hum her pop
melodies.
LP Record $6.95/Tape Cassette $6.95
Send check or money order payable
to: Pleiades Records
Department BT
P.O. Box 7217, Berkeley, Ca 94707
Distributed locally in many areas.
Also available: "Margie Adam. Songwriter." LP Record/Tape Cassette $6.95. Songbook $5.50.
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increased stress they experience under
therapy often triggers attacks.
"We must have shelters for women before we start providing services for the
batterers. It would be extremely irresponsible and dangerous for us to reverse
those priorities."
While little is known about batterers
there do seem to be some characteristics
which most share. According to Hamlin,
batterers "minimize, deny, and sometimes lie. He will tell you that all he did
was shove his wife when in fact he broke
her arm.
"Many have these Dr. Jekyll/Mr. Hyde
personalities. They can be very charming
and manipulative one minute, then extremely violent the next."
Depression and suicidal impulses are
also common among the batterers. Hamlin told the audience that batterers "may
kill themselves. They may kill their wives.
If you're going to work with domestic
violence you'd better be prepared to deal
with death."
Star called on the audience to fight violence on all fronts and to form community coalitions.
"This has been a year of tremendous
growth, development and change," said
Fojtik. "But there's still a long way to
go."
Goals parents never taught you
BY DIANE DURBIN
Women who attend the workshop on
Women and Management at the Family
Service Center on March 1 will work with
someone who has gone through the
process she's counseling about.
It took Patty Feigle two years to decide to return to college. She made the
transition from Memorial housewife, to
graduate student, to a position as a therapist at the Family Service Center. And
she has set the kinds of career goals for
herself she urges women she counsels to
work toward.
Feigle says the way women are socialized in this culture results in a mind-set
that makes them passive and afraid to
take a risk. "It happens very gradually
from the time the child is born. There are
certain (sex-role) expectations. I think
orte of the most limiting things is the parents' overprotectiveness of the female —
not allowing them to take a risk." Men
see risk as an opportunity of winning or
losing, while women see it as entirely
negative, she feels.
Two books she recommends in the
workshop are The Managerial Woman and
Games Your Mother Never Taught You.
The Managerial Woman is "so objective," Feigle says, "it doesn't say 'poor
women.' It doesn't put men down, or
the system. But the other work is much
more judgemental of the system and men
in general.
The books deal with the patterns of
difference between men and women and
the way these differences affect career
decisions. Men are taught from childhood
they'll have to get a job and be self-reliant. The result is that men make early
career decisions
Women, however, learn to be dependent and seek out a man to take care of
them. As a result, women make late career decisions. And after decisions are
made there may be conflicts with ideas
about being a wife and mother.
Feigle makes no value judgements
about whose characteristics are best.
Instead, she uses techniques of therapy
to teach women to use the information
to increase awareness of how differences
limit women seeking advancement, ways
to break old patterns, and how falling
back into old habits hinders development.
Feigle says the most important thing
for any woman to do is establish a support system outside the job and find a
mentor — or, ideally, both a male and a
female mentor — on the job.
"The world has been developed and
Diane Durbin is a graduate student at UH/CLC
and is the mother of two daughters.
built by men for men," Feigle says. "So,
as we move out into it, it's just like moving to China. If we want to live and survive in China, we've got to learn Chinese.
Then, we may be able to share some of
our own knowledge and they could get
some new information from us. I think
women will do that. And in time men will
learn. When there are enough women in
power positions, it will change. But you
can't change it until you've got the power
to do so."
The first technique Feigle uses is a
free association exercise in which women
"write down things they like, just anything, as wild and wooly as they want. As
you look back over the list you can see
patterns in life about what you want,"
she says.
Feigle then has the women fantasize
two job descriptions. "I want them to
dream as far as they will allow themselves
to dream. The point is to take the lids
off," she says. "If you ask them to make
it a reality thing, they will limit it so
much that the exercise will not be beneficial."
Next, Feigle has the women fit one of
their dream jobs into reality by constuct-
ing a time line for how long it will take to
reach their goal. She also asks them to
include on the time line what they would
like to do after they reach their goal.
"It's pretty darn scary to get to the
end of the road, so some people will stop
themselves from making their goal because they don't have anywhere to go
afterward," she says.
Now the women are ready to figure
out action steps for reaching their goals.
"We actually do that in the workshop,"
Feigle says, "so that when they leave they
have some pretty good handles on where
to begin.'
The Women and Management Workshop is something Feigle has brought into
the Family Service Center in the year and
a half she's been there.
"Moving into the whole business end
of consulting has been my idea. I've gotten the green light to go to workshops to
learn to do some of these things."
Feigle will conduct the workshop at
the Center's central office, 3635 W.
Dallas. It costs $25 and will run from
9:30 a.m. to 4:30 p.m. Reservations
should be made at least a week in advance
by calling the Center's Educational Coordinator at 524-3881.
HOUSTON BREAKTHROUGH
FEBRUARY 1980 |
