THE BOOGAR f
PUBLISHED BY THE JOURNALISM STUDENTS OF THE HOUSTON JUNIOR COLLEGE
HOUSTON, TEXAS, FRIDAY, MARCH 31, 1933
GRAFF ZEPPLIN TO
FLY OVER CITY 'N
Bull, Burp, Balogna
Featured I n Tent
(Continued on page 86)
John D. Wattafeller has donated
$25,000,000 to the Houston Junior
College, according to an announcement today by Eddie Cantor,
self-styled president of this great institution.
The money will be used to endow
a University of Houston and tentative plans call for a large campus
situated on the present site of Herman Park.
The new school will include 15
academic buildings, 7 dorms, a football stadium seating 100,000, and a
student's building where beer will be
served free to those making E's or
Concerning the gift from Mr.
Wattafeller, Doc. Eddie Cantor
"We deeply appreciate Johnny's
gift and we hope that he will make
a habit of donating to us. You see
us school guys is gotta live."
Willie Dates, president of
school Board issued the following
"Since Johnnie has give us some
dough, we are passin the benefits to
students by havin free tuition."
Lean Dupre says:
"I rekon as how our jobs is safe
since Jawn D. broke loose wid t
The trustees of the new school decided to name it "Wattafeller Insti
tution" in honor of the great bene
factor of humanity.
Other features of the new college
(1) "Free ice for free nearbeer.'
(3) "Smaking permitted in class.
WHAT! NO DEER, OR
NATHY NATHY ON
ALL YOUSE GUYS
OPENING DOOR TO R
(4) "Teachers don't mean a thing
(if they ain't got that swing—poop
(5) "Classes will be 15 minutes or
On looking at Wattafeller*s gift
again we find it to be one of his
famous "shinney dimes." What a
man, what a man!
. Continued on page 4)
The charming newspaper r
W. Skipper was startled last night
by a peculiar noise. A few momenta
later a window was opened and in
stepped two young ladies, wearing
2.glowing red masks. Mr. Skipper
backed against the wall with wide
eyes, and his mouth a large gap in
his face. Horror was the dominating emotion writent across his map.
While one of the girls held a
small mean-looking pistol leveled at
the heart of this insignificant "Wal
ter Winchell," the other young lady
explored his pockets and finally
found a small black note-book. After thanking C. W. for his co-operation they disappeared through the
window from which they came.
Students can now eat their dinner without having their favorite
dessert published in "The Cougar"
now that the "little black note-book"
Latest Flash!: Police report that
the two heart bandits have been captured and are now in Cell 418, City
Jail, where their friends may visit
them. They are listed on the police
blotter as Ethel Margaret Falk, 14,
1907 Dowling Ave., and Mary Elizabeth Horan, 12, 4909 Vs Ave E, Galveston, Texas.
damning evidence" which
caused the apprehension and incarceration of the two bobbed-haired
thrill bandits was a small black notebook, which is said to contain much
damaging evidence concerning activities of students and faculty members
at the H. J. C.
"Buy American" Says
Local Street Sweeper
Here's news for you for the first
time published and by the request of
the students mentioned. Hamp Robinson and Mary Bradley have secured their marriage license, wish
you the best of luck . . . Kitty Hurlock is now going steady with Clark
Gable . . . Libbye Lewis is secretly
married to a boy whose initials are
A. S. . . . Ada Dickey has a boy
friend at A. & M. College . . . Lucy
Grady once won a beauty contest.
(Believe it or not) . . . George Moers,
short, brunette, graduate of San
Jacinto, is now attending Houston
Junior College . . . Bill Henderson
will not tell his hobby—we wonder
why . . . This may be a shock but
Max Cohen made six A's in his
courses .. . T. V. Rogers, and Welton
Lee Salm, are two of the nicest boys
in our school, saw them at Boysen's
the other night, with Lucille Black
and Dorothy Frew . . . Saw Isreal
Rabinowitz after two o'clock in the
morning kissing his girl, in fact
we even know who she is . . . Did J.
P. Morgan blush the other night;
you ask him why . . . Read in yesterday's paper from New York that
Adolph Marks is the advertising
"The Big Conflagration"
Great clouds of black smoke were
billowing toward the sky. The whole
etherial domain was tinged with red
as great tongues of fire leaped to
General confusion reigned as a
third degree fire alarm sounded. All
the fire-fighting apparatus in t
city was called out because Juni
College was burning, and Dupre just
Students ran helter-skelter,
one seemed to know what it was
Night classes were in full force, all
the students were so silent, as usual
in their lessons that the alarm
startled them. Each scholar grabbed
his precious books and ran out of hi
class-room in a daze. All were s
bewildered that a wild scramble of
bumping and knocking-down prevailed.
Soon the big sturdy footed gigolos
ire safe on the outside. Then came
e crippled brigade of flappers
marching out in squad formation.
The brave fire-fighters were running hither and thither in their mad
search for the fire.
A very heroic squad of the more
manly students composed of Robert
Piehl, J. J. Mooney, Joe Green, Joe
Yates (no kin to Jack Yates) formed
a unit and decided to venture back
at great peril into the fire illuminated building.
Stealthily they stepped. Each second brought them nearer, maybe, to
On they fearlessly marched. What
a courageous band of "men," (?)
everyone suddenly thought.
Smoke filled the air, it was stifling but onward they went. Down a
corrider where volumes of thick black
Continued on page 4
WHY DANCE? ASKS
100 YEAR GIGOLO
(Special to Dean Dupre from
Please allow me to congratulate
you on the marvelous records made
by the athletic teams of Houston
Junior College during the past several years. You and the entire
coaching staff composed of one (1)
Archie W. French, deserve much
credit for the fame these teams have
brought to your school.
I also wish to congratulate you
id Coach French because of your
work in developing those All-Amer-
ican football players; namely, George
Adams Le Fever, Jr. (Ah, how my
heart grieves with you when I realize
how sorely you need a player of his
caliber this year), Israel Rabinowitz,
H. A. Willrich, and Stillman Taylor.
What big brutes of men these specimens of American manhood are!
Archie (Mastermind) French has
also been selected as AU-American
all-around coach. Ah, the stategy
that man used! I will never forget
the time he had his star fullback,
Rabinowitz, make a touchdown for
the opposing team so that they would
become over-confident. And how he
could take defeat! Remember the
time the opposing base gall team
nosed out his nine by the score of
597-0? What a man!
You will probably be pleased to
know that you have been awarded
a membership in the N. A. V. A. M.
Club. I take great pleasure in
stowing this honor upon you. By
the way, could you lend me five dollars until next Tuesday? Your old
P.S.—Don't forget the five.
What Is This Thing Called Courage?
OR, IS A BOY'S BEST FRIEND HIS MOTHER
AL CAP0NE GIVES
TALK IN ASSEMBLY
I'm pleased to meecha and I
hope that youse guys will profit by
mistakes dat I made," said Al
Capone when he recently addressed
H. J. C. assembly, "and if dere
is any ting dat any of youses wants
me to tip you off about—then lets
hear it, or forever after keep yer
Capone moved his audience to
tears when he told them about the
time he had to bump off his mother.
"M udder was as good a dame as
a guy could find anywhere, but she
tried musslin in on me busness—and
I just had to croak de ole lady for
de good of de business I guess it's
bad to bump yur own mudder, but I
was kinda sorry frterwrds."
Al told about his rapid rise in the
crime world from the very beginning. "I wuz mish—, ambish—, aw
hell! I wanted to do something big
rollled in nite school. That
was the Chicago Crime College. I
majored in beer running and hijacking getting me degree in tree
years time. That wuz because I
much outside work. An you
mugs listen, I paid me entire tuition
tru dat school by forged checks."
The noted gangster explained how
i decided to continue his education
"I wanted one o dim doctars degrees ,and I tawt dat I would look
swell in one o dose black nite gowns
dat collies guys wear. So to de insti-
tushun of higher loirning for you, Al,
I see to me.
Capone explained the importance
of machine gunning in gang wars,
told about his post graduate
work in those fields. In fact he
wanted to show just how adept he
was with the gun by plugging Lucy
,dy, but that could be no proof because it is almost impossible to mis3
"I don ant to bore yuh wid a lot
o chin music, so I will have some o
de boys to pass out pretzels and
And dat beer is de best stuff
dat crooks can steal."
BY THE EDITOR
Of all the ambitious young men
earning glory an livelihood by their
fistic prowess, Kid King was among
the least promising. He was big
enough, strong enough, and ugly
enough—but he just lacked courage.
When Joe Devon, his diminutive,
but astute manager, sought the Kid
for a training period he always found
his fighter engaged in moody session
of thumb-twiddling. When Kid King
was not active at playing with his
digits he wduld climb under the
gym's boxing ring and sit and bite
his finger-nails. All efforts to extricate him were of no avail. His
manager told him the gloves were as
large as pillows, his sparring partners were small, and the mat well
padded—but Kid King refused to
become addicted to the manly sport.
The Kid not only refused to grow
enthusiastic, but he also expressed
complete and profound lack of interest. Put in its mildest form—
the kid was afraid.
One day the Kid's customary
brooding spell was interrupted by
"I just signed you for a fight. The
opposition will be old Tom Gunn. He
is so punch-drunk that he thinks
John L. Sullivan is still champ.
King's only response was a half-
audible sigh of regret. Somehow
he could not sum up the courage to
make his local debut in the prize-
"I was just thinking, Joe, and I
decided to get a job and go to work.
Then I can pay you back the money
you spent for my railroad fare here."
"Don't look so morbid Kid. Why,
when I picked you up at Colton College I thought you had the markings
of a champ, but now you turn out
"I am afraid you don't understand,"
explained the ex-Colton football star.
"I'm not ungrateful, but I want to
smoke the calumet of peace and
forge the swords into plowshares."
What he, no doubt, meant was to
turn the padding of boxing gloves
into padding of a pillow so he could
lie down and sleep it off.
"If that's the way you feel about
it—Okay. But you can beat this
punk with one hand. Why he's so
old that "
The night of the fight found fight-
manager Joe Devon engaged in taping the hands of an inspired Kid
King. The Kid understood that
Gunn was just a set-up who spent
most of his time in the ring in a
horizontal position. When the duelists met in the center of the ring for
final instructions from the refe:
King beheld an aspect that almost
staggered him. He looked at Gunn:
never had be seen so hideous a face.
There were cauliflower ears that
were evidence of his inability to
ward off blows. Deep scars above
his eyes suggested the trench-work
of the late war. A flattened nose
was nothing more than a pancaki
distorted flesh and cartilege which
had probably been hammered on
more than a blacksmith's anvil. The
mouth! It was studded with so many
scars that one glance at it reminded
Kid King of the sides of a zipper.
The uglycountenance of Gunn looked
as if it had been run through
At the bell, King proceeded to play
the Anvil Chorus on that flattened
nose with such rapidity and sureness,
that Gunn looked up to see if somebody wasn't dropping bricks on his
head from up above. He was still
looking up when he regained consciousness.
After having clouted Gunn into a
sharp solo, King's confidence and
eagerness to fight increased. He even
Continued on page 3
Bing Crosby, Rudy Vallee and
their company of seventy-five famous stars will offer one of the most
magnificent musical extravaganzas
ever to be held in Houston, in Houston Junior College, April 5, at 7:00
Among this group of internationally known celebrities of radio stage,
and screen are Walter Winchell, the
Boswell sisters, Ed Wynn, the fire
chief, the.Baron and Charley.
One of the highlights of the program, which is full of the latest
musical numbers just off Broadway,
will be a beauty parade, with Clara
Bow, Kay Francis, Greta Garbo, and
Marlene Deitrich, exhibiting the latest in bathing wear from Palm
Phil Cook will imitate three tongue-tied men in a zoo, Little Jack
Little will play two pianos at the
same time and Douglas Fairbanks
will demonstrate his athletic ability
while Will Rogers gives humorous
comments on topics of the day.
One hundred gigolos, most handsome—and pleasing will assist Rudy
Vallee himself, who promises that
Continued on page 4