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The Cougar, Vol. 6, No. 12, May 24, 1933
File 003
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The Cougar, Vol. 6, No. 12, May 24, 1933 - File 003. May 24, 1933. University of Houston Libraries. University of Houston Digital Library. Web. September 24, 2019. https://digital.lib.uh.edu/collection/10270243/item/44/show/42.

Disclaimer: This is a general citation for reference purposes. Please consult the most recent edition of your style manual for the proper formatting of the type of source you are citing. If the date given in the citation does not match the date on the digital item, use the more accurate date below the digital item.

(May 24, 1933). The Cougar, Vol. 6, No. 12, May 24, 1933 - File 003. Daily Cougar. University of Houston Libraries. Retrieved from https://digital.lib.uh.edu/collection/10270243/item/44/show/42

Disclaimer: This is a general citation for reference purposes. Please consult the most recent edition of your style manual for the proper formatting of the type of source you are citing. If the date given in the citation does not match the date on the digital item, use the more accurate date below the digital item.

The Cougar, Vol. 6, No. 12, May 24, 1933 - File 003, May 24, 1933, Daily Cougar, University of Houston Libraries, accessed September 24, 2019, https://digital.lib.uh.edu/collection/10270243/item/44/show/42.

Disclaimer: This is a general citation for reference purposes. Please consult the most recent edition of your style manual for the proper formatting of the type of source you are citing. If the date given in the citation does not match the date on the digital item, use the more accurate date below the digital item.

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Title The Cougar, Vol. 6, No. 12, May 24, 1933
Alternative Title The Cougar, Vol. VI, No. 12, May 24, 1933
Contributor
  • Marshall, L. P.
Date May 24, 1933
Language English
Description From title page: "Published by the journalism students of the Houston Junior College."
Subject
  • College student newspapers and periodicals
  • University of Houston
Place
  • Houston, Texas
Genre
  • newspapers
Type
  • Text
Identifier LH1.H6 C6; OCLC: 10270243
Collection
  • University of Houston Libraries Special Collections
  • University of Houston Archives
Rights In Copyright - Copyright Owner Unlocatable or Unidentifiable
Item Description
Title File 003
Transcript THE COUGAR STOP ME! IF YOU HAVE HEARD THIS ONE BY MILTON GREGORY George Washington was the eighth president of the United States— John Hanson and six others served as president before he did. America was named by a German professor in a French school for an Italian navigator in the service of the king of Portugal. The strawberry is nor a berry. neither a fruit General Pershing did not say "Lafayette we are here." This was included in a speech made by Colonel Charles Stanton, chief disbursing officer of the A. E. F. In 'The Old Brewery' a tenement house in New York City, there was committed on the average of one murder a night for fifteen years. Here a little girl was stabbed to death one night for the sake of the cent she had begged. A python can swallow and digest a large deer—antlers and all. The fastest thing alive is Cephenemyia, or deer-fly. It can travel at the rate of 816 miles per hour—$00 yards per second. On the island of Tahiti, in the South Sea, it is raining every hour of the day, every day of the year. This island, though only half as large as Rhode Island, has 80 riv- SCANDAL SHEET Red can be seen at a greater distance than any other eolor. Ice skaters do not skate on ice. The weight of a person upon the narrow steel runners causes the ice underneath the skates to melt, due to the pressure—so the ice skater really moves upon a film pf water. James I, king af England over 300 years ago, took a ride in a submarine in the Thames river. Both ice and steam are dry. lee is only wet when it melts, and then it is not ice. Steam is not only dry, but is also invisible. Some of you may be glad that is is the last issue of the Cougar, so you will know that I'm not spying on you, and yet others may be Who is this junior at A. & M. that has stolen the heart of Libbye Lewis? Saw him with her last when they were uptown, April 20—Wonder where they were going? According to rumor, T. V. Rogers has been getting home rather late after classes—because of a certain blonde, Lillian Schwartz. Why is it that J. M. Johnson and T. V. Rogers are always together 'hen in school, but after school that their ways part somewhere on Lamar? Who is this boy from A. & M. that Ava Dee Jackson had a blind date with Friday night April 28 ? We, that is I, wonder who is the Junior College boy that is trifling on his girl out in the Heights, by taking Evelyn Cochran home now and then? Can you imagine anyone with such low mentality as Welton Lee making the highest grade in chemistry the first semester? Why does Leon Green, a former student, come to school so often? Bill Jones, a former student, is now studying at a pharmacy school in Fort Worth. Who is that good looking boy that Alma Stewart had a date with recently that made her so popular at H. J. C? And so goes on the romance of Jimmie Brinkley and Lucille Black —Oh— Who is this young, nice looking boy that is always with Mattic Chapman ? In a recent Bugs lab period Mrs. Usong, who was sitting in the near part of the room with Leeds Bayli had the misfortune of having her necklace broken. Wonder if Leeds- had anything to do with the destruction of these pearls ? Why does Frances Nesmith cut Bugs so often? Well that is enough: I won't have those that aren't named in this column anymore—I'm sorry this is the last issue, so until the next time I see you,—Reservoir! THRU THE KAMPUS KEYHOLE BY SEYMOUR SCANDAL HO-HUM- Reception— Continued from page 1 Curry, and Winifred Greenwell, Jefferson Davis; Vivian Farguson, Ruth Tausend, Paul Farren, Howard Gready, and Bonnie Bell McBride, John H. Reagan. Mrs. Cora Clifton Stafford, Lucille Black, Harriet Allen, and Harry Gray were the Junior College representatives. Dean N. K. Dupre of Houston Junior College introduced Dr. E. E. Oberholtzer and the faculty of Junior College, Mrs. Pearl Bender, dean of girls; Mrs. B. F. Coop, board jvicinitv of the sieeper, and the class member; Mrs. Oberholtzer, and Mrs. letters. The instructor raises an F. M. Black. Doctor Oberholtzer I yebrow irl reprimand. then welcomed the guests to the Suddenly the bell rings, ending the evening's entertainment. class. The sleeper's eyes snap open Immediately following the election: just as the teacher's gaze falls upon of the queen of the reception, the him. Both smile. The boy wonders grand march started around the gym-|;f he was discovered in his slumbers, nasium. Dancing followed, and an |and the teacher makes a mental note, The English instructor is intent upon lauding the works of O. Henry and other masters of the short story. The class, with hands neatly folded upon desks, is giving perfect attention. Wait! One boy in the rear of the room is nodding. As the teacher puts emphasis on a word, he jerks and opens his eyes, but seeing that al! is well, he allows his chin to drop to his chest. He leans at a precarious angle. The boy in the next seat, alarmed, reaches out a steadying hand. The tyrant sleeps on. The instructor looks up from her book and glances at the attentive class. She beams with pride, but fails to see the black sheep. She again becomes absorbed in her book. A light snore is heard in the Seymour was thinking of mentioning the fact that Mary Elizabeth Horan robs the cradle because she seen in Galveston with a 14 year old high school sophomore, but ihe is now in love with another sucker, Paul Sparks, we won't say word about it. (This item cost Seymour Scandal ten cents.) It seems that Harry Gray has an appeal that women cannot resist. A his picture in the paper and wrote him a mash note. AGONY COLUMN Dear Ann: Please come back and leave that Crawford mug alone. All is fo Your own little Patsy Watsy So Riehard Macfee has deserted Lil Swartz for the blonde member of the Gohlke duo. Take a hint, Mae. Mr. Macfee dotes not like gabby women. We hear that the camera that took those alluring photos of Mesta Waggoner at the bay has not worked since the pictures were snapped. There are reports going around the school that Robert Piehl has the most conceit and the loudest mouth of anybody in the world. Personally, n't know about the conceit, but riously doubt that he has a larger mouth than Joe E. Brown. Fred R. Bimey declares that he is 100% wet, so we would like to know, "does that make him ALL WET?" Have you seen the picture Bill Holt took of his girl in Louisiana? Seymour would like to know how he got it developed. Now we hear that Wilma Lindsey asked Henry Withers, "Why don'tcha come on up, some time?" Pat Foley once cared for a decided brunette named Katy Mae. Hoss" Ross was also peaches and cream over a lass named Nora. We wonder why he never talks about Birney tells on self. In the little town where Mr. Fred Birney went to school, only sissies ever graduated. It was unthought of for boys to go to college. (According to Mr. Birney's own statement.) "So the year I graduated from :oIIege only two other boys had ever ■eceived degrees." Now is that insinuation or what? HUMOR Feeney—Look here, Allen, when e you going to pay me the four dollars for keeping your dog? I've had him about a month now. len Marshall—Why Melvin, the pooch ain't worth more than six Judge Arthur Morgan—"You are accused of stealing a chicken. Anything to say?" Fred Page—"I just took it for a lark, sir." Judge—"No resemblance whatever. Ten days." Annie Boone McJunkin—"little boy, does your father know you smoke?" Homer Riley—"Yes, does your mother know you speak to strange men?" Florence Scott—"Where do nuts come from?" Helen Wood—"They grow Florence—"What kind of trees do doughnuts grow on?" Helen—"A pantry." Joyce Gillett—"Where do jelly fish get their jelly?" Irvine Woodruff—"From the o< currents, I guess." Melvin—Well, 'supposing I keep him for what you owe me. Allen—Not by a jug full. Tell you what I'll do; keep him two more weeks, and then you can have him. Mrs. Bender—A big man like you might be better occupied than in uelly catching little fish. Mr. Dupre—Perhaps you're right. But if this fish had kept his mouth shut he would'nt be here. Paul Sparks—My girl is so dumb she thinks a gin rickey is a Japanese taxi. Bellhop (after guest had rung ten minutes): Did you ring sir? Guest: Hell, no! I was tolling; I thought you were dead. A young city girl was holidaying in the country and became rather friendly with a young farmer. One evening as they were strolling across a meadow they saw a cow and a calf rubbing noses in the accepted bovine fashion. "Ah," said the young farmer, "that sight makes me want to do the same." "Well, go ahead," said the girl, "it's your cow." entertainment by the students of Houston high schools was held in the auditorium for those not wishing to dance. The attendance, estimated at 2000, was handled by the Guild Savant, Houston Junior College's men's club, who acted as ushers- wishing that all of her students v as attentive as that youth. The sleeper leaves the room for his next class where the seats are more comfortable, and the teacher puts on a frown to prepare for that rowdy next period class. Summer is here. Ho hum! her? So your old correspondent, ' wishes to take the space to congratulate Kitty and Jimmy, is now saying "mud in yer eye" to you all, pos- My for the last time this term. BASE BALL TEAM BOASTS UNDEFEATED SEASON Houston Junior College's base ball team has compiled the greatest record in the history of the school by playing through the 1933 season without a single defeat marked against them. Although it is true that they have won no games, the six boys composing the team have done much to uphold their school's honor in athletic circles. Led by Jimmy Oliver, hustling manager, the Cougars have shown much fight, working out three days each week. Although the win and loss column remain undented, the season has not passed without satisfactory results. Manager Oliver has acquired a good sun tan. AROUND THE HALLS WITH SHORTY We can't help noticing that HAMP is becoming more and more a "one- man. HE and WOOZY look so nice together that something hould really be done about it. Heard some damsel say that GEORGE HEYDRICK was the answer to a maiden's prayer, after due consideration of his pleasant grin, have decided that there might be something to it. The depression is still here, we saw FRED AEBI picking up second-hand chewing gum the other day, and HARRY GRAY likes to eat gravy right out of the serving dish—you know, bread here, and gravy there— home-like. Something should really be done about people like MINNIE TOPEK who still brags about her spanking escapade in the hall. (Jesse Darling has a sure HAND, anyway). PAT FOLEY, young in age and old in experience, glad you told mei Pat. We hear that BUDDY NORTON thinks veils are of no avail on dates, and that the boy who is true to one girl (one at a time) is think ing about resigning from all clubs and going into the gigolo business as a private enterprise. Who is he, LEROY MELCHER? Don't rush, girls. If you would inquire of DONALD AITKEN he would probably tell you that there are twenty-four inches in one foot. What kind of a fvigi- daii-e repair man would BOB STALLINGS make? Deuced clever of our young aviator to change her name to COPELAND. Oh, for the life of an aviator. Who is MACK DOUGLAS moonlight dancing with these nights? Marion Robinson—"What's become of the young man who used to bring you all the flowers?" Lou Johnson—"He married the girl at the florists." And of course don't forget the prisoner who wanted to skip the rope. Fred Aebi: Darling, I have been thinking of something for a long time. Something is trembling on my lips. Sissy: Why don't you shave it off? Duncan Neblett: "I see that in London a man is run over every half hour." Elamey Fisher: "Poor fellow!" "Where did the car hit him ?" asked the coroner. At the junction of the dorsal and cervical vertebrae," replied Mr. Hooker. And the burly foreman rose from s seat. "Man and boy, I've lived in these parts for 50 years," he protested ponderously, "and I never heard of the place." Now comes the story of the absent- minded professor who rolled under the dresser and waited for his collar button to find him. Fulton Renfro: "Haven't you got Jane and June confused?" Ben Young: "I'll say! They don't know what to expect next!" METROPOLITAN STARTS SATURDAY FREDRIC MARCH "EAGLE and the HAWK" with CAROLE LOMBARD GET YOUR LINEN SUIT Sfeed^ Main at Preston Houston, Texas LOEWS COOL. Love as hot as the desert sands! It sizzles! "THE BARBARIAN" with Ramon :: Novarro MYRNA LOY An M-G-M Picture!
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