Published semi-monthly during the
college year. Subscription, (1.00 per
year. Single copies, 10 cents.
. ,F. R. Birney
Society Maurine Edminster
Sports—Men Martin Lowe
Humor Jane Witherspoon
Activity .Frances Baty
Exchange , Rubye Tunnell
Feature .Ethel Mercer
Chapell Freeman Pauline Ault
A. C. Irwin
Going through college is more ok
less analogious to the process of going
through life. And we are not possessed with sufficient boldness to say
whether it is better to go through life,
or college either, in the manner of an
oyster or perhaps in some other way.
But we do have our ideas.
We believe that a certain amount of
awareness to college conditions, an interest in things in general and the ability to respond actively to what one
thinks right or wrong, is many times
better than being a trained seal and
thinking that life is a printed fact and
a fact because it is printed.
It is not our purpose to create false
values. And should we indicate that
extra-curricular college life is of more
import than the formal element or class
room activity we would be doing that.
But what we are saying is simply this:
a college career like life is not endless,
therefore make the most of it.
You are embezzeling the time life has
allotted to you when you remain inert
and refuse to realize any worthwhile
experience proffered you by either college or life.
Malcom Campbell is fairly good in his
field. But in competition with the
curve artists of ihe Houston Junior
College we feel that he would simply
fail to qualify.
The British speed monarch is a
sickler for good visibility, track conditions, and what not In fact in the
world of dare-devildom his performances are far inferior to those of some
of our worthy students.
And as this editorial does not set out
to attain great length, it will include no
accident sl&tistics or phrases couched
in the darker shades of crepe. Suffice
to say that when Death takes a holiday
those holidays must perforce end. And
t6r.ce it is he who is a master of cjni
elusions, let's not immitate hin, by ending his vacation.
I AM THE NEWSPAPER
Born of the deep, daily need of a
nation, I am the voice of now, the incarnate spirit of the times, monarch of
things that are. My "cold type" burns
with the fire-blood of human action.
I am fed by arteries of wire that girdle
the earth. I drink from the cup of
every joy and sorrow. I know no death,
yet am born again with every morn,
with every noon, with every twilight I
leap into fresh being with every new
world's event. Those who created me
cease to be; the brains and heart's blood*
that nourish me go the way of human
dissolution. Yet I live on and on. I
am majestic in my strength, sublime in
my power, terrible in my potentialities,
yet as democratic as the ragged boy
who sells me for a penny. I am the
consort of kings, the partner of capital, the brother of toil. The inspiration
of the hopeless, the right arm of the
needy, the champion of the oppressed,
the conscience of the criminal. I am
the epitome of the world's comedy and
tragedy. My responsibility is infinite.
I speak, and the world stops to listen.
OUR COUGAR GROWLS
It seems that even a nice peaceable
kitty will become peeved if it
ficiently goaded. Just Talk believes
that somebody must have walked
The Cougar's paws. Otherwise, how
could our Cougar have been growling
the other day when our reporter, Genevieve Pledge, Visited him for an interview? Here's how Genevieve explains it:
I dropped in again last night for my
customary chat with The Cougar,
and believe me, he was belligerent!
He met me at the door, mouth foaming
and teeth bared. I was tempted to turn
and run, but I could see well enough
that he had something on his mind, and
I knew from the looks of him that it
would make a good story. So I gritted
my teeth and commandeered my shaking knees long enough to reach a seat.
A lack and alas, the lief of a reporter
Well, The Cougar didn't even sit
down—much less curl up comfortably
he usually does when I visit. He
slunk from one side of the room to the
other, wiggling the end of his tail like
wild animal stalking some prey.
Then came the storm! At first I
could hardly get what he was saying,
he talked so fast, and roared in between words. Finally it dawned on
me The Cougar had heard some gossip.
Someone has whispered in his ear that
his school lacked spirit—my! was he
"And this," he roared, "is the most
OB-STRE-PER-OUS part of it; the
school has spirit—it just doesn't
Everyone leaves it to the other
fellow to do the boosting. I am so sick
of the word co-operation that I refuse
to use it but you get what I me;
gave a weak nod of affirmation and
rescued my hot from a rather depressed position in the seat of my chair
Dear Editor: I may live over it, but
I'll never look the same. Personally,
I see nothing that will appease our beloved pet but to prove to him that he's
HOW TO USE LIBRARY
Have you ever considered studying
in our library. Here is an idea or two,
on the subject, that Irene Johnson contributes:
Do we college students recognize
and appreciate the school library and
the possibilities it offers us? I am
afraid that we do not.
The large room with good lighting,
the tables, the chairs, and the books
all offer a very desirable pis
study, but have you noticed the conduct of the majority of the students
who use the library? How few use it
for study! There are groups who hold
lengthy social chats, others who roam
from the hall into the library and out
again, with no apparent aim in view,
but they disturb the students who
would like to concentrate on their
Just the other day two of our most
likeable girls entered the library. They
approached one of the social groups.
One seated herself upon a corner of
one of the tables, opened her compact
and, between comments and giggles
(which by the way sounded hysterical), re-did her face. The other was
chewing gum, and continually popped
it so loudly that it could be heard almost the entire length of the room.
Did this show disrespect for Mrs.
Shearer or for fellow students? I am
(Continued on Page 4)
A Junior College student who wishes
to remain anonymous gave us the fol
lowing verse. Each of us could he
H. J. C. a great deal if we would adopt
H—ere's to the Junior College—
O—h, let's work through smiles and
U—ntil we have it peerless, and
S—pread its renown through the years.
T—-he name of it should be our pride;
O—ur efforts here will its fate decide,
N—ot one of us but should say we've
J—ust a little loyal pulling
U—ntil we've made its fame—
N—o less should we expect to do
I—n the Junior College .name.
0—n our way then, let us be
R—eaching up for H, J. C.
C—ome on, you sophs and freshmen,
0—ur school lies in our hands.
L—-et's make it bigger and better—
L—et it be known through lands.
E—ach one of us can do our part,
G—ive loyalty and a loving heart
E—very day, and make ourselves a
OF HOUSTON JUNIOR COLLEGE.
GRINS and GROANS
Whew! Thank goodness those six
eeks exams are finished at last . . .
even The Cougar is breathing a sigh
of relief. Here's Kenneth Phillips' view
of the situation.
When do "sophs" pass up a date
To burn the midnight fire?
It's when to pass it's rather late,
Then comes disaster dire.
When do "fish" begin to squirm,
And call themselves "Big Hams?"
When do leaves begin to turn?
The night before EXAMS!
From one of Texas' own poets, Grace
Noll Crowell, we quote this poem:
A PRAYER FOR COURAGE
God make me brave for life,
Oh, braver thp.n this!
Let me straighten after pain
As a tree straightens after the rain,
Shining and lovely again.
God make me brave for life,
Much braver than this!
As the blown grass lifts let me rise
From sorrow with quiet eyes
Knowing Thy way is wise.
God make me brave—Life brings
Such blinding things.
Help me to keep my sight,
Help me to see aright
That out of the dark—comes light.
I say the word, and the battle flame;
the horizon. I counsel peace, and the
war-lords obey. I am greater than any
individual—more powerful than any
public opinion. Rightly directed, I am a
creator of confidence, a builder of happiness in living. I am the teacher of
patriotism. I am the hands of the clock
of time, the clarion voice of Civilization. I am the newspaper.
—JOSEPH H. FINN.
By KENNETH PHILLIPS
Do ya ever feel kinda blue? Well,
somethin's wrong with ya if ya don't.
Just wonderin' if you folks needed any
bolsterin' or boostin' or whatever the
word is, Phil decided to let ya in on
a few of his fillosofies. He hasn't got
no degree from a universalty yet, but
he's seen petty nigh all a pusson needs
to see. Phil'e be.
Here's a little verse that sorter gets
under yer skin—makes yo wonder if
you 11 ever be liek it says:
"The wounds I might have healed!
The human sorrow and smart!
And yet it never was in my soul
To play so ill a part;
But evil is wrought by want of
As well as want of heart!"
Perty good, isn't it? Reminds me of
a htle motto I heard once: "Oh, loyal to
the royal in thyself!" I guess everybody
hez somethin' royal about him.
Shakespeare wrote a line or two on
that order. If I can think it up, I'll
pass it on. Oh, yes, it ran somethin'
like this: "This above all: as the night
the day, Thou can'st hot then be false
to any man."
William was a reg'lar feller. You all
didn't know I was such a hound fer
liter'ture, did ya? My Sunday Schoo)
teacher told me another verse one time..
You folks might not go to church an'
prayer meetin', but this might help ya',
"There's so much good in the worst
And so much bad in the best of us,
That it does not behoove any of us
To criticize the rest of us."
I don't know what "behoove" means,
n' I don't suppose you do, but we kin
(Continued on Page 3)
Bill Smith: You know, I got a bright
idea out of a corner of my brain today.
John Hill: Huh! Must have been a
Little Girl: Aunty, why do you put
powder on your face?
Aunt: To make me pretty.
Little Girl: Then, why doesn't it?
A GOAT GETTER
He: Do you pet?
He: Go ahead; I'll be the goat
Harold Steele calls his fraternity pin
"the soldier" because it has been on
so many fronts.
Fairfax Moody: What ya wating for?
Julia Green: A joke.
Fairfax: Send him my love.
Fond Father: Your studies are suf-"
fering. Do you need a coach?
Marion Moore: No, dad, a roadster'll
Fresh: I'm in a terrible fix and have
no idea where to get money from.
Soph: Good, I was afraid you thought
you could get some from me.
Mr. Birney: This is the plot of my
Story. A midnight scene. Two burglars
creep stealthily toward the house. They
climb a wall, force open a window and
enter the room. The clock strikes one.
Gladys Jacobs (breathlessly): Which
He wandered into the tennis club
tournament and sat down on a bench.
Whose game?" he inquired.
"I am," murmured the flapper sitting next to him.
Joe Ed Winfree; "My good man, you
had better take the street car home.
Lefty Morris: "Sh'no use. Mother
wouldn't let me keep it in the house."
Visitor in Lnuchroom (suspiciously):
"How is the hash made here?"
Attendant: "Made, sir? Hash ain't
"Not many fellows can do this," said
the magician (Herbert Sawyer) as he
turned his Ford into a lamp post.
Ora D. Brown (who has cornered ?
burglar in his living room): "Hands
up or I will shoot."
Quick-Witted Burglar: "Five for de
O. D. B.: "Sold."
Kenneth Phillips: "That woman in
the box hasn't taken her eyes off me
for an hour."
Milton Moffitt: "How do you know?"
"I'd prefer being a chauffeur to being
a jockey," said Albert Kindel, "for a
jockey sees only the horse's neck while
the chauffeur sees everybody neck."
Gordon Davis: "How quickly can
you stop your car?"
Mac Dougherty: "It all depends on
the size of the pedestrian—a big one
s me right away, but if he's undersized it slows me down gradually."
John Reagan: "That garage man says
e're carrying entirely too heavy a
Nora Louise Calhoun: "Couldn't you
throw out the clutch, dear?"
Fred Stark: "Yeah? Thats' where I
clean the paint off my brushes."
Absent-minded College Professor
(after a date): "We'll go on from here
Carlton Moore: "What's on the
Marian Moore: "Oh, just a little
Old Gentleman (in crowded street
car): "Has anyone here lost a roll of
bills with an elastic band around
Chorus from a Dozen Car Riders:
"Yes, I have."
Old Gentleman (calmly): "Well, I
just found the elastic."
"Beatrice," said Mrs. B. to her
daughter, "if Harold asks you to be his
wife, tell him to speak to me."
Beatrice nodded and then said: "And,
if he doesn't ask me, mother?"
"In that case," said her mother, "tell
him I want to speak to him."
A man pinned under his car after an
auto accident was being questioned by
"No," he replied, "this is the worst
fix I've ever been in."
Fond Uncle: "You boys of today
want too much money. Do you know
what I was getting when I married
Nephew: "No, and I'll bet you didn't."
HIS BIG MOMENT
By ABBY GABDAB
Snookums University was in a high '
state of frenzy. The blue and gold was
behind ofr the first time in a basketball game this year. The maroon and
white of Whoopumup College were in
the lead and almost half of the game
On the substitutes bench slumped
down in despair was "Guggles" Moonstone. He was one of the subs and there
was a long story about this youuvthat
would clutch at the heart srings of a
man (or woman, too).
When he had first come to Snookums
he was a lad who neevr had a worry
but since then his marrh/ brow was
continually in a frown as he sat alone
thinking. Many people and even his
class mates wondered as to what was
wrong with him as an explanation to
them and my dear readers I will telj
you the sad story that wrecked
"Guggles" poor heart.
one of the few boys that
had made good on the freshman basketball squad and received their letter.
Ah, he was sweet and agile center if
there ever was one. Then came his
sophomore year and trouble began to
pursue him. He was confident that he
would win his first varsity letter but
it was the same old story, there
were too many that were better than
he, and he was destined to be a lowly
Such was the case in his second
year and time passed and then came
his junior year. It seemed as though
he would, after so long a time, finally
have his desire at last fulfilled but
Sp,ke-Eye Jackson proved that he
was more capable than poor Guggles
and back to the subs was again the
cry for our hero.
he was in his senior year and
still he was one of the poor eads that
warmed the bench. His poor heart was
torn to smithereens bits by bits.
Atfer bemg out ofr the squad for three
this? It is superb,
"Ah, and what is
What soul. What
s going to graduate without
1 his one big moment,
having lettered i
From the start it was a known fact
that the championship of the Crazy
Nme conference would be between
bnookum and he old rival, Whoopumup College. Neither team had lost a
game, and now the story is brought up
to the present time.
Guggles was sitting on the bench
chewing his finger nails off one by one
Would the half never end? It seemed
as though it would not to our hero
Finally his wish was gratified and the
shot was fired ending the half. Snook-
team left the floor weary and
tired. It was the first time this season
(Continued on Page 3)