Of The Houston Junior College
Houston, Texas Established 1928
Published semi-monthly during the
college year. Subscriptions, $1 par
year. Single copies, 10 cents.
Managing Editor ...A. Marks
Assistant Editor _.. James Julian
Faculty Advisor _ F. R. Birney
Sport Editor _V. F. Harrison
News Editors- -..Betty Covington
Feature Editor . L. Ray Pell
Literary Editor A. Gordon Jones
Humor Editor _...._.Ruth Depperman
Exchange Editor Wenonah Phelps
James Page, Cy Shaw, Herman Lewis,
Anna Sloan, Louis Higginbotham, and
E. O. Boulet
A NAME MANIA
BY LOUIS HIGGINBOTIIAM
THURSDAY'S THE DAY!
Plenty of EATS! Plenty of FUN!
That is about as accurate a forecast as
we can give for the forthcoming picnic and field day to be held at Sylvan
Beach Park next Thursday. But that
is enough to convey the idea that
everybody who attends will thoroughly enjoy himself.
Tradition is the essence of school
life, and as Robert Littell would say,
"One of the traditions of the Houston
Junior College is that all of the students hold a big annual outing at the
close of the school year—the first of
these will be Thursday."
From time to time throughout the
year there have been vague suggestions that we "ought to have a Junior
College Day", "maybe go on a picnic",
"put some life into things", and so on
ad infinitum. But nobody took the
trouble to do anything about it except
to spill a tremendous volume of the
well-known super-heated atmosphere.
Some even said that, "it won't go
over, you can't put on an affair like
that at Junior College." Well WE
CAN!! And what is more, WE ARE
Cy Shaw was one of those who believed that we should have such an
event, and in the face of remarks such
as the foregoing, he has worked out
the necessary details and secured the
consent of the powers that be, provided there is enough interest on part of
the students. Cy has worked on this
idea and has devoted a lot of time to
it; he has received the fullest co-operation from Dr. Oberholtzer, Mr. Dupre, and Mrs. Bender; it now rests
with us, you and me, to put this over.
There is absolutely no reason why
we should not make Thursday a banner day in the history of this institution. Smaller groups have had several
similar events, ond now is the time
for all of us to get together and make
the First Annual Junior Coliege Picnic and Field Day the biggest thing
of its kind that ever happened.
Committees have worked out the
necessary plans to care for food,
transportation, and the program. The
price has been kept well within reason, and transportation will be provided where necessary. Anyone
should find something on the program
that will appeal to him. There will be
volley ball games, baseball games,
races of various types, boxing, swimming, and dancing (to say absolutely
nothing of the fact that there will be
a full moon that night).
Certainly everyone will have a good
time. Now shake off that seasonal attack of spring fever and come on
down. See YOU at Sylvan Thursday!
Victor Voebel seems to be busy as
a Bee and as absent-minded (?) as a
professor; well, well, not everybody
can be class president and the job isn't
all honorary—it requires an energetic
somebody who goes places and sees
things and does 'em in a big way.
O. K., Voebel.
One SUMMERS evening Jerome
Fitzroy Stockaberry went out for bis
DAILEY walk. He told the BUTLER
that he would be home EARLY. To
the COOK he said, "Don't forget to
make COFFEE for dinner."
A STRONG GAYLE was blowing.
He walked in his SCHERTZ sleeves
and what a KUHLMAN he was!
He was a good WALKER. He went
down WEBSTER to CRAWFORD, and
a BLOCK down that STREET past a
WHITE CHURCH and met the SEXTON whom he say WANDER out after
ringing the BELL.
"What funny bumps you have on
your face," he said to the SEXTON.
"SCHWARTZ," was the BLAND
"You must have a PECK of them.
I'll be they are a PAYNE."
"Stop, you BLANK! You can't be-
LTTTLE me like that! I'll SLAUGHTER you. But first I'll ROB you."
"Oh, don't do that! COMHAIRE to
the EDGE of this PARK. Let's sit
under this ASHE tree and talk it
"ALLWRIGHT, but for you it'll be
"Please, have a HARTT!"
"No, I PLEDGE! This b the last
PAGE of your life!"
"How TRUITT seems! ALSUP with
"Yes, you COWART!"
"Don't call me that! "I'll SLAY you
with a STONE."
Jerome wasn't a QUITTER, so he
did SLAY him. But the LAWS began
to HUNT him. He went into a JETER
id had to FLY. Suddenly he saw the
LACY WHITE clouds BOLE up
BLACK over the BALDRIDGE of the
HILL, and he knew that a WTLDE and
WOOLEY STORM was coining.
"NOBLE," he said, "now I can escape! I don't give a FLICK about the
He ran PELL-mell through the
RAINEY weather until he came to
old BROWN HOUSE. He asked
the lady who answered the door for
help; she talked it over with her son,
'Come INMAN. EUBANK on us.
We'll HYDE you in the GARRETT."
And no sooner SEDDON done.
'You must be hungry," the lady said.
"Sit here in the HALL, and I'll FRY
you an EGG. Eat your FILSON, then
go upstairs and COYLE up on that
PYLE of GOTTEN in the GARRETT
and go ti> sleep. Take your hat with
you, so you won't leave any MARKS
behind you. And be sure to LOCKE
led MOORE and MOORE. The
roof begai to LIECK. He took cold.
'KERBOW!" he sneezed. Then he
started to HAACKE until he was
GREEN in the GILLS. "KAUFMAN,
cough!" the old lady said, "it'll do you
)0d!. Try VICK*S salve, too."
'Tve a notion to turn myself in,"
Jerome r-id a week later. "I can
make BOND, no JURY would convice
and I will be a FREEMAN again.
I'd like to go BOLLTNG."
"Wouldn't do you any good!" the
_..n said. "You couldn't get out of
here unless you were a BIRD and had
WEBB-feet I can't even get out to buy
'All we've got in the house is one
LEMMON, a box of GRAHAM cracfc-
with a broken SEALE, some CARRAWAY seeds, a box of KELLOGG'S
Corn FLAKEs and some blackberry
pie. And I can't STANBERRY pie!
There were some chickens roosting
the window-sill, and I tried to
catch them, but the COCHRAN and
the hens followed and they all drown-
My HARRIS turning grey from
worry, I GRANT you!"
"With the water so high, we should
atch some SALMON. We can use
ome FINEGOLD hairpins for HOOKS
. . but we han't any BATES. We
could gig them; I'm a good HOOKER
but we haven't a STEELE SPEAR.
We gotta MARSHALL our forces
LESHER want to starve. We'll soon
be in the MORGAN worse.
"But what MORRIS to be done?"
"If we had a boat we could
SLIDER down to the water and ROWE
opt. I'm afraid to swim because of
"And this rain will ruin everything.
If the fire BURNS in the STOVALL
the time maybe that will help."
But they didn't have any WOOD so
To Victor Voebel goes most
of the credit for the success of
the Fifth Annual Senior reception held May 6 in the college
gymnasium. Vic is president of
the graduating class.
—Courtesy Houston Post
Heading our list of exchanges this
week is the PEGASUS, a semi-annual
edited by the students of University
High School at Ann Arbor, Michigan.
This is a literary booklet containing
stories and poetry written by both the
junior and senior divisions of the
school. There are really some excellent articles in it, and we certainly
enjoyed reading it.
From Moberly Junior College in
Missouri comes the MIRROR. This
school certainly has the right idea
about studying; in fact, they seem to
share our sentiments exactly. How's
"Don't study when you're tired or
have something else to do.
Don't study when you're happy, for
that would make you blue.
Don't study in the morning, and don't
study at night,
But study at the other times with all
your main and might."
From Prairie View State Normal and
Industrial College at Prairie View,
Texas, comes the PRAIRIE VIEW
STANDARD. We want to congratulate this institution on its excellent
publication which we found both interesting and instructive. It consists
mainly of school accomplishments and
articles of general interest. The Normal is a Negro institution.
Traveler: How much do you charge
for a room?
Clerk: Five dollars up!
Traveler: But I'm a student.
Clerk: Then, it's five dollars down.
Do we like the J-TAC from John
Tarleton Junior College? Just ask us.
Who wouldn't like a paper that publishes an article like the following
one. (Just what we've been trying to
convince our parents of for the past
" 'Viewing motion pictures causes
less eyestrain than reading a book for
a similar length of time,' says an officer of the National Society for the
Prevention of Blindness."
they got the laundry basket and let
"We're all a bunch of ZAPPS," said
Jerome. "Let me think WUNCHE—
or maybe twice—and I'll ge us out of
here SAFEY WRIGHT quick!"
But at that moment he awoke from
his dream in the BUTTERY of the
dairy where he was a WORKMAN.
"SWEITZER! WATSON my mind
to make me dream such dreams?" he
asked as he reached for another
doughnut to DUNK in sour cream.
— Music undoubtedly hath charms,
because every time Prof. F. R. Birney
requests Gladys Jacobs and Violet
Herbert to sit as far from each other
as possible they go into their duet,
"We'll be back together again;" and
sure enough, they have to be separated again at the next meeting of the
class. The duet has practically been
augmented into a trio; Melbadel
Wright now joins in on the chorus.
Melbadel, by the way, has eliminated
all doubt as to who is the most versatile girl in H. J. C. Her fame as an
actress has spread to all parts of the
city, and now she comes forth as a
directress. At tennis, she Tildens 'em
all, and as a dancing partner she seems
to have a monopoly on all the boys.
She is almost on a par with Ruth
Depperman when it comes to getting
the young men to wait on her. But
all of those are only sidelines; her
specialty of specialties, the thing she
will probably make her life work, is
operating a Flit gun.
That quiet natured, good looking
blonde who has been attending H.J.C.
since September, but hasn't disturbed
anybody yet (except when she smiles
at you) is Alma A. Stewart. She really
has quite a good reason for being
quiet around here. Alma has a young-
sister, however, who does like publicity; Elllen (that's the sister's name)
was once told by one of her admirers
that there was something about her
that drove him crazy. She calmly replied, "Well, that remains to be seen."
Leroy Dailey, basketball coach,
swimming instructor, life saver, physics
demon, etc., has added one more
source of pride to an already impressive list; he had his signature weighed
at the recent Rice Institute Engineering Show (Adv.). If our memory is
reliable in such matters, the result was
the neighborhood of twelve-one
millionths of a pound. Congratz,
One more landmark has disappeared;
another tradition has been removed;
another of H. J. C.'s distinctions is no
:; the inseparable have parted, fn
other words, Roland Hall has given up
his pipe; he says it was too potent for
Such a calamity is indeed tragic
just at this time; just think what a
great help that pipe would be in combatting the invading hords of mosquitoes There is some consolation In the
alization that the Hon. J. Granville
Pope still retains his special fumigator,
but Pope is only a part time student
and is, therefore, at a disadvantage.
The pests do their worst work during
Leslie Martin, Harry Echols, and
George H. Snider are trying to take
up a collection to help Hugo Lueders
get his shirts out of hock. When
Lueders came to school Friday wearing only his winter undershirt with
the sleeves cut short (Oh, no! Not
that at all. I mean he had no other
shirt on) the three kind-hearted boys
immediately hit upon this plan of helping their less fortunate brother. Contributions may be sent to either of the
three or to this writer (Adv.).
Latest report of scout No. 6%:
Artful Art" Burns tried to bribe R.
Louis Higginbotham to write him up
big in this issue of The Cougar. . . Curtis Dunk, he basso from out Heights
way ,said he thought Lula Grace Kel-
jgg, the shoeless wonder, had died her
air another color. Kellogg came
ight back with "Fooled you that time;
there aren't any more colors." Puzzle:
Who won? . . . Ben M. Fly, Jumbo
(no adv.), eating champ of this institution, has a decided weakness for
blondes. Other requirements, big car
and lotsa dough. ... Pat Foley, who
calls the Heights boys "teahounds," did
not accept the invitation he received
to be flower girl in the San Jac. May
Fete. . . . Roger Bell and Louis Ded-
man do NOT wear the same pair of
dainty blue knickers on alternate days
r.s reported. Incredible as it set
there are two distinct pairs. . . . Verna
German still continues to look down
on anybody less than six feet tall.
Hundreds of H. J. C. students will
journey to Sylvan Beach Thursday to
initiate the first annual field day for
Houston Junior College.
School officials have put forth much
effort in obtaining this day for college play, and have co-operated with *
the students to the utmost in planning each detail of the outing.
This Students' Day, we believe, is '
one of Cy Shaw's original ideas. Shaw,
president of the student body, has
worked tirelessly in an effort to make
the party a huge success.
Shaw stated that Friday was the
first choice in the selection of a date '
for the picnic but since many difficulties were encountered with plans
for this date, Thursday was chosen '
A big attendance will undoubtedly
mean a permanent Field Day on H. J.
C. sport calendar.
LOU LURIE, ICE CREAM KING -
Lou Lurie, well known college boxer,
seldom keeps a promise. The "battler"
works for an ice cream wholesale
house when not in school, and conse- "
quently has an unusual supply of
friends. But Lou should keep books
on his promises.
Several times the popular fighter
has promised this writer a pint of
cream but in each instance he failed
to appear with the banana-nut flavored •
e now find that there have been
others who have stood patiently on
e dark corner awaiting the genial
So, beware of Lou Lurie! He demands that you first do him a big
flavor, then promises the cream and .
then you TRY to get ti.
This Gordon Jones is quite studious.
Besides being a public speaker of "
merit, Jones is never caught napping
by a prof.
What a relief when he is called upon
to discuss some phase of a tedious as-
ignment. When he finishes, the professor never has an opportunity to say,
"What else, John?"
Are you a racqueteer? Some people
ire, honest. A whole bunch of 'em
are. We are going to have a racquet- .
eering tournament and before long,
says Mr. French. I'm not kddnig you a
bit; there have been some excellent
tennis players excavated from among
the student body—and a tournament is
in the making, so come on you ,
racqueteers of the ole alma mater and
give your support to the glory that
Forget each kindness that you do as.
soon as you have done it ;
Forget the praise that falls to you the
moment you have won it;
Forget the slander that you hear be- *
fore you can repeat it;
Forget each slight, each spite, each
sneer, wherever you may meet it;
Remember every kindness done to you
what'er its measure; •
Remember praise by others won and
pass it on with pleasure;
Remember every promise made and B
keep it to the letter;
Remember those who lend you aid and
be a grateful debtor;
Remember all the kindness that comes ,
your way in living;
Forget each worry and distress, be
hopeful and forgiving;
Remember God, remember truth, re-#
member heavens above you;
And you will find through age and
youth, that many hearts will love
| you. —MILFORD M. SMITH.